Once upon a time there was a belief that was a story that ceased to be told.
And the whole world smiled its widest smile and sang its sweetest song and danced to the rhythm of all life.
As she realised she is free
“You’re not good enough.”
“No one will love you.”
“You’re not OK.”
“They’ll not like you.”
You’re not pretty enough, smart enough, short enough, tall enough, loud enough, quiet enough.
You – Are – Not – Enough.
Beliefs held in a body. Held in a mind. Held as we walk and talk and sing and laugh. Stories we live by. Made up stories that feel real. Until they don’t.
And the voice will change and chatter some more. This way and that. Hard and then soft. Loud and then quiet.
Will it ever stop? How to change it? How to lose it? How to push it away?
An exhausting fight.
An eternal battle.
Maybe for fun you could begin to make up some more appealing phrases and beliefs?
I am alive
I am here
I am beautiful
I am joy
I am fierce
I am life
I am everything
I am free.
The feel good beliefs that heal rather than hurt. The ones that love your soul rather than crucify it. And it’s good to remember to rest in these as much as you can. The loving ones, the stories of the infinite and the free. But the chatter of the mind is part of the human condition. You can change the story to one that works better for you. You can turn it down to a lower volume. You can believe something else – make it up differently. But it will still whirl away. The frenetically bound book of the mind telling its story. Wanting to be heard. Different stories depending on the day.
But what if attention doesn’t have to be paid? What if by paying less and less attention, the chatter begins to quieten and silence itself? What if there can be a place where that inner voice no longer feels like ‘you’ but something that you can relate to in a very different way? Where you have a choice? Where it can talk its talk and dance it’s dance but you are no longer listening and no longer the dance partner.
What if you can drop all your stories.
Who would you be without them?
What would it mean about you if none of them were true. The good and the bad, the pretty and the ugly?
What if, by doing this you become free?
What would freedom then mean? What would you do with it? How would it feel?
Do you actually want it?
So many questions. Why not make up an answer? Create a new story?
Or maybe instead, rest in the place before the stories came.
There’s a big concept.
But I trust you can find this place. I trust you know it already. It’s under a stone, and beneath the waterfall, and deep in the coolness of the earth. It’s in the veins of a leaf and the wriggle of a worm. It’s in your heartbeat and their night time breath. It’s in the eyes of your lover and the giggle of a child. Do you know it yet? Of course you do. It’s everywhere and nowhere. It’s in you and in me – in spite of the beliefs and the stories. It’s who you are when you forget and when you remember. The eternal riddle of life never needing to be solved. So please know you can let go of the fight to change the story and alter the belief and instead love what is there. Relax a little (or a lot). The confusing, the contradictory and the infinite all dancing their merry dance of life as pure entertainment for us all. Watch it, but don’t believe it. Play with it, but don’t be played by it. Rest well and be free.